"I am the almighty patrick. my biceps are as huge as the sun. also my sexy body makes women faint. i have another title of which you may know me better: Lord Patrick, King of the Ladies. i am not much of a warrior, but more of a sexy beast. if the time came, and i must fight, i would call all of my women to fight for me. the women would gladly die in honor of me, for they know full-well that if they do good in battle they will be worthy of an evening alone with the almighty PATRICK. Some information about myself: i have been born and raised in the red-lands and i have uprooted and came to this place to pledge to Hrothgar. i shall bring my lovely ladies and we will all pledge allegiance to the mighty Hrothgar! continuing about myself, i enjoy walks by the ocean (with a female) and also, i enjoy candlelight dinners and chick flicks. i prefer having nights that have happy endings if you "gnome sane?" i work in my spare time, when i am not with a woman. i am employed at Izzy's Pizza bar. perhaps you have all heard of round table? my place of work is much greater than that one. i have aspirations to one day be a police officer, or if that does not work a jester for lord Hrothgar!! but before i die i hope to be like Bob Barker; rich and cant keep the ladies off him. so my new friends, let us get drunk, belligerently drunk. we may have one night stands with obese females and never contact them again!!! oh yes, and all hail Hrothgar!" i will explain this later but i thought it quite hilarious and i dont know why, but i thought of you. i would love to have seen the confused look on your face as you read this. (:

i delete comments >.<